Today was a special occasion for me.
I had my first mammogram. And a half. They took a second set of scans of my left breast for thoroughness. I am not sure if they charge extra for that or not.
I now understand why women put this off. It sucks. It hurts. Your breast gets pressed between two plates then you hold your breath while the image is preserved for posterity. There is pretty much no part of the experience that is pleasant except for the relaxing music being played in the exam room, which is probably based on research of alpha brain waves and lowering anxiety or some such nonsense.
The mammogram is important, though, and since I have been having quite a bit of tenderness on the left side, I went to the doctor yesterday and she recommended getting a baseline mammogram done.
I have known for several years that I have fibrocystic breasts which are always lumpy, worse before my period. It makes breast self examination more difficult but still important. The doctor found several lumps on each side, which today I was told are just cysts that are normal for my kind of breast tissue. I had ultrasounds done following the mammogram which did not show anything that needed to be removed or large enough to be drained. Because after squishing my boobs between two plates, I was really wanting someone to rub a wand all over them, too?
Avoid caffeine, wear bras that provide good support (even when you sleep), and try some heating pads for the pain. That was the advice I was given. No caffeine? Are you serious? Did you not see my post about caffeine? Here: http://open.salon.com/blog/nurseliz/2009/06/28/how_my_hardcore_addiction_ruined_my_life_last_week
It's better than a cancer diagnosis, but after two hours in their office, and more pain now than when I walked in their door, I am considering telling them they should rename their office the Breast Torture Center.
Go torture yourself, too. In honor of Breast Cancer Awareness month.
P.S. This woman is only smiling because she has been drugged.
Below: Okay, hold still while I lower that plate down until your breast has less than an inch to breathe. Great. Thanks.
